Belonging: Finding Family Among Strangers

Matt Gilhooly (00:00)
What if the person who was supposed to protect you was the one who let you go? Robin lost her mom at eight years old, and by eleven, her father had chosen his girlfriend over his kids and sent Robin and her younger sister into the foster care system rather than let them live with an aunt who wanted them. No goodbye, no contact with her family for five and a half years. And somehow, out of all of that, Robin built a life overflowing with love.

Robin Rosenbluth (00:25)
they gave him a choice. Let us live with my aunt who wanted us. We had been living with her once the court, you know, ruled that if he were negligent we you know, they were trying to protect us. or any other relative or send us to foster care.

So he sent us to foster care.

Matt Gilhooly (00:48)
You're listening to the LifeShift Podcast. I'm your host, Matt Gilhoolie. This show is built around one simple idea, that sometimes a single moment can change how we see everything. Each week, I talk with someone about the moment that shifted their life and how they learned to live differently after it. These are not stories about having it all figured out. They are stories about what it looks like to keep going once the story changes. Thank you for being here. Here's today's story.

Matt Gilhooly (01:19)
Hello everyone. Welcome to the Life Shift Podcast. I am here with Robin. Hello, Robin.

Robin Rosenbluth (01:23)
Hello, Matt. So nice to be here.

Matt Gilhooly (01:26)
Well, thank you for wanting to be a part of the Life Shift podcast. It's always interesting to me because I don't know you and I don't know most of my guests. And by the end of these conversations, we've talked about things that like I would probably not have had conversations with other people that I know even closer, you know? And so it's a it's such a beautiful experience. And I love that you and other guests trust me to have this conversation and

in hopes that the people out there are listening and maybe maybe they feel less alone in their circumstances, maybe they feel inspired to move through a circumstance, or maybe they just see themselves in the story. So thank you for just wanting to be a part of this.

Robin Rosenbluth (02:07)
Thank you. You know, it's very similar to memoirs. When you meet

Matt Gilhooly (02:11)
Mm.

Robin Rosenbluth (02:11)
with people who write memoirs as I have done, it's very intimate. So I love that and I've loved

Matt Gilhooly (02:20)
I mean.

Robin Rosenbluth (02:21)
listening to your podcasts.

Matt Gilhooly (02:24)
thank you. I we should have more conversations like this, not just on podcasts, you know, and just

Robin Rosenbluth (02:29)
Yeah.

Matt Gilhooly (02:29)
just with each other in the world, because, you know, even though our stories are wildly different in most cases, like the way we feel about certain things in certain moments, it feels very similar. So like we have so much more in common, really. I know it's cheesy to say, but even though our we

Robin Rosenbluth (02:45)
No, it's real.

Matt Gilhooly (02:46)
live wildly different life, like we're all human. We're all just trying to do the best we can with the circumstances we're given. Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (02:51)
Absolutely. Absolutely.

And if we could it'd be the common humanity that people would see in everybody.

Matt Gilhooly (02:58)
Yes, we can still hope and we can maybe model the way for for people out there

Robin Rosenbluth (03:02)
There you go.

Matt Gilhooly (03:03)
to just you know, I think vulnerability begets vulnerability. I think connection just becomes stronger when we can be real with each other.

Robin Rosenbluth (03:13)
Agree.

Matt Gilhooly (03:14)
So all right, so before we get into your story, I would love for you to tell us who Robin is in 2026. Like how do you show up in the world? How do you identify these days?

Robin Rosenbluth (03:25)
Well, these days I'm trying to identify as an author because I've written a memoir and I will talk with you a little about that because it's about life-changing circumstances. It's called Living with Strangers, Healing a Wounded Heart in a Distant Land. And so I am an author. I'm also a fundraiser. I still work and do coaching.

and I'm a mother and a grandmother and a wife and I have two beautiful children and one grandchild and I've been with my wife for forty two years and I love Brooklyn. I live here and I'm a good friend and I take care of my siblings as well. I'm connected to them and

I help them when they need it. So that's me in twenty twenty six. I love lots

Matt Gilhooly (04:23)
A lot of hats.

Robin Rosenbluth (04:24)
of different things. Yeah, I love to kayak, I hike,

Matt Gilhooly (04:27)
Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (04:27)
I do yoga, all those kinds of things. Read a lot.

Matt Gilhooly (04:30)
Well,

Robin Rosenbluth (04:31)
Yeah.

Matt Gilhooly (04:31)
well, you're keeping busy. Good for you. It's too hot in Florida

Robin Rosenbluth (04:33)
Ha ha ha

Matt Gilhooly (04:34)
to go outside and do any of that stuff, so good

Robin Rosenbluth (04:36)
Yeah, I get that.

Matt Gilhooly (04:38)
for you up there. no, I love that. I think you know, there's so many th hats that we can I know, say we have or choose to have. And it sounds like you're leaning into a whole bunch of them that probably bring you a lot of joy and probably some frustration and anger in those that come with it too.

Robin Rosenbluth (04:56)
Well, you know, I have a lot of gratitude for having a happy adulthood after having a not very happy childhood. So

Matt Gilhooly (05:04)
Yeah. Well, that was a good choice for you to make that decision because I think there's a lot of people that have rough childhoods and aren't fortunate enough to choose a path of gratitude. You know, I think I say fortunate enough because I think I count myself lucky that even though my childhood had some bumps and stuff, I could have taken it.

a totally wrong direction. So I feel lucky that I chose the direction that I did.

Robin Rosenbluth (05:30)
I agree. Well, you know, I don't think it's just luck either. You have to work at it. A lot of therapy helps, you know, and what you said

Matt Gilhooly (05:37)
I agree. Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (05:39)
earlier, Matt, just allowing yourself to be vulnerable, you know, if you hide it all away and think it's just gonna go away by itself, it doesn't. So you have to talk through it. I'm glad. Me too.

Matt Gilhooly (05:50)
Well, I learned that. Yeah,

yeah, I learned that the hard way. but I'm grateful for it. I'm grateful for pushing it all down for a long time. I'm grateful for the mistakes that I made because I would not be this version of me, which is again super cheesy, but you know, like all the bumps and all the things brought me to this version. And I know had my mom not died, I would not be this version of me. Had I not struggled through grief, I would not be this version of me. So I'm sure you have feelings about that. But

I'd love for you to kind of paint the picture of your life before this main life shift moment that we're gonna talk about, fully understanding that you have probably many of them and yeah. So paint the before version of Robin. Go back as far as you need to, which I think is probably early on.

Robin Rosenbluth (06:37)
Well, I think similar to you, I don't know how old you were when your mom died, but mine died when I was eight and there she is up there.

Matt Gilhooly (06:45)
Same.

Robin Rosenbluth (06:45)
There she is. same, wow. and my father really couldn't handle it. and he remarried very quickly and that didn't last. And he was the kind of guy who

sort of identified based on who he was with, what woman he was with.

Matt Gilhooly (07:06)
Hm.

Robin Rosenbluth (07:07)
And after the the second marriage, I mean he loved my mother, but he he must have I don't know, he just fell apart. Maybe it was because my mother guided him with a steady hand. I think I was fortunate enough to have at least seven years of being mothered. yeah

Matt Gilhooly (07:27)
Yeah. Was it a good seven years? Okay.

Robin Rosenbluth (07:30)
It was fine. I mean, I had a a very okay I mean, we didn't have a lot of money, but we had a lot of love. My mother was definitely there for us and my father worked a lot to provide. But then he found a woman who didn't want his children and I would say that my life shift moment was when he decided well he was very negligent and he

He

used to stay over at his girlfriend's house. You can say that when they're adults, but I was eleven by then and I have a sister five and a half years younger than me, and I was essentially parentified. He would leave me ten dollars a week. and he would just go off and this lasted for quite a while and

You know, I I mean I learned how to budget and I learned how to shop and I learned how to cook, but I was only eleven years old. I had two older brothers, but they were off earning money and doing their thing and yeah, so I had to watch my younger sister

Matt Gilhooly (08:36)
Did they live with you as well?

Robin Rosenbluth (08:38)
well, for much of the time, but mostly they would just sleep there. you know, they weren't mean and

Matt Gilhooly (08:43)
Very detached.

Robin Rosenbluth (08:44)
Yeah, they just they just had their lives. They were most you know, my older brother was already twenty one and my other brother was five years older than me. So he was already a teenager doing teenage things. But

Matt Gilhooly (08:59)
Yeah,

and I would imagine too, just from my experience of losing my mom at eight, like were you had you even processed that loss? Had like how did that loss affect you? Because by eleven I was not very good. So I can't imagine you were feeling too hot.

Robin Rosenbluth (09:17)
No, well

so I at eight I w you know, I was so sad, you know, in in in my book I actually write about what happened and and when my mom the last time I was with her, when I was eight, and she she died of ovarian cancer, so she was in and out of the hospital. But the last time she came out of the hospital we spent time together.

and she was a twin, but this is important part. Not an identical twin, but her twin sister was

Matt Gilhooly (09:48)
So is my mom.

Robin Rosenbluth (09:50)
you're kidding. All right, well, I love this. So you know, this is the thing. Yeah, well, in any case,

Matt Gilhooly (09:55)
Probably different story, but go on.

Robin Rosenbluth (09:58)
my my aunt, my mom's twin, and my older brother,

knew what was happening and you know tried to reason with my father, but ultimately they took him to family court on charges of negligence. But here's the the life shift. The judge basically said was just family testifying about my father. And there was no quote objective proof. So they so essentially my father was

one

basically and he had a choice. Now he had gone bankrupt because he didn't know how to manage the store that he had. And they gave him a choice. Let us live with my aunt who wanted us. We had been living with her once the court, you know, ruled that if he were negligent we you know, they were trying to protect us. or any other relative or send us to foster care.

So he sent us to foster care.

yeah, so it's called Living with Strangers. That my

Matt Gilhooly (10:56)
You and your sister, I'm a

Robin Rosenbluth (10:58)
sister and I, my older brother was already mature and my other my teenage brother was taken in by his best friend's family. So my sister and I went into what's called congregate care. You know, where you live in a big institution and and you wait for somebody to say that you could go live with them. So all of these strangers.

Matt Gilhooly (11:23)
Yeah. So I mean

Robin Rosenbluth (11:23)
And that I would say

changed my life, obviously, in so many ways.

Matt Gilhooly (11:28)
I could see in s yeah, in so many ways. I I my heart stops at this sense of like pure abandonment twice in like a matter of a couple years. Your mom, that feeling of loss for me felt very much like abandonment. I don't know if it felt like you felt felt

Robin Rosenbluth (11:45)
Absolutely.

Matt Gilhooly (11:46)
like that for you. But then your father like she didn't choose that. But then your father chose that. That's I mean

Did that hit you right away as as something very

not normal and it's something very offensive. Okay. So you had the wherewithal to understand that. No.

Robin Rosenbluth (12:00)
Absolutely. I mean, none of it was normal. Yes. I

mean by then I was eleven and I as I told you, I mean I was so

Matt Gilhooly (12:11)
Right.

Robin Rosenbluth (12:11)
when I when I had a stepmother for about a year, that was also awful because and he basically abandoned us there. She after like the first week or two, she was like Cruella or maybe not, but I was like Cinderella. You know, I had to do

so many chores and her teenage daughter didn't have to do any. And I mean, really, I was like ten and eleven.

So my father didn't defend

us. And my brother was like on him, like, Dad, how could you like let Robin have to do all of this when, you know, my stepmom's daughter didn't do anything? So I was constantly abandoned by my father. and even when he dropped us off to this

Children's shelter, you're gonna love this. It was called the Society for Prevention of Cruelty to Children. Like the dogs, right? Like, yeah, I know. Except

Matt Gilhooly (13:05)
Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (13:06)
they substitute children for dogs.

anyway, it

Matt Gilhooly (13:09)
Did it feel like a kennel?

Robin Rosenbluth (13:10)
did. It well, you know, I was so upset, you know, to not have been with my aunt who really wanted me.

And and I had loved living there. Can you imagine after taking care of my sister and being on my own for about three months while the court was going, I think it was about that much time. I was living with her, she was taking me shopping, you know, I had enough food to eat. I was loved.

Matt Gilhooly (13:35)
Well, and you felt wanted. Right. And someone

wanted you there. Exactly.

Robin Rosenbluth (13:41)
Yeah, yeah. So it was

Matt Gilhooly (13:43)
They I can't imagine.

Robin Rosenbluth (13:45)
it well and you know the other thing that was really

Matt Gilhooly (13:49)
Was that well 'cause

it got worse?

Robin Rosenbluth (13:51)
Well, so here's what happened. So in the in the

Matt Gilhooly (13:53)
Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (13:53)
in we called it the children's shelter. In the shelter, you know, it was the first time really that I had lived in an integrated community. You know, I grew up in Long Island, it was very white, the neighborhood was white, there was one black teacher in my entire school, there were no black kids. And foster care is, you know, disproportionately African American.

And an I was raised Jewish even though I'm sort of a cultural Jew. I identify as Jewish but I'm not religious. we were the only there there were three white kids in the shelter and my sister and I were clearly the only Jews. in fact they used to pray in in Jesus' name we pray Amen after you know, before the meal.

And it took me like two weeks to go over and tell the director, you know, could we just say in God's name we pray, please? Anyway. so actually I would say that at the age of eleven I became very sensitized to racism. I know that might I mean, I these were the people that I became friends with. I needed to I'm a I'm a extrovert, so I always try and find friends.

And I did. actually there was I'm a kid. I just

Matt Gilhooly (15:11)
And you're a kid too at the time. Like you wanted

Robin Rosenbluth (15:14)
I wanted people to you know, I hated being there. We were all in one school room, you know. I

Matt Gilhooly (15:20)
Mm.

Robin Rosenbluth (15:20)
had been kind of a good student and you know, then this teacher had like twenty plus kids of all different ages and you know, there was barbed wire all over the pl it was just it was a it was a very difficult place. And then there was one girl

who was very dark skinned, I'll I'll never forget her and Roseanne and you know, I used to hang out with her a bunch and she went to foster she got a foster family, you know, took her, invited her to live with them, and then after two weeks they sent her back. And they sent her back finally the the director told me because they were light skinned and she was very, very dark.

I

could not believe that. So, you know, here I am getting this this understanding of the way the world works and you know it was anyway, it ultimately led me

Matt Gilhooly (16:12)
I mean, you

you had an understanding of unfortunately this direct feeling of how the world

Robin Rosenbluth (16:17)
I knew what was wrong.

Matt Gilhooly (16:19)
can work. I mean, like, just I mean, not even the part about your friend there, but just for you, like all the things that you experienced like are not supposed to happen, nor is what happened to your friend there. And so, like, I can't I I mean, there's so much for like an eleven year old. I'm thinking of your sister too. Was she f seeing the same thing or okay.

Robin Rosenbluth (16:38)
My poor sister. Well,

you know, it was much harder for her because, you know, my mother got sick when she was two or three, you know. She didn't have the you know, I watch my grandson now and my daughter is just such an uber mom. And you can see the development and the way that this little boy is so loved. It just it's so gorgeous, you know?

And it makes me think, you know, those first three years, Matt, that's everything. You know, that's your foundation. I think when you don't have that, it's much harder. You know, it's much harder to find your way in the world. so

Matt Gilhooly (17:20)
Yeah. So y

yeah, so tell us what happened when you were there.

Robin Rosenbluth (17:24)
Well, I mean, I was there for about four months and I hated it. I mean, I made some friends and I learned things and whatnot, but but and I you know what's crazy is you know, you adjust to your norm. So by the time they actually found a family for us to live with, and thankfully it was with my sister, and I think that took time and then for some you know, then they tried to find a Jewish family, which was rare I guess. I don't know.

This was back in the nineteen sixties, so let's put a time frame on it. So you know, I can remember again having to live with strangers, which I'd never understood, you know, why they just you don't even get to meet the people who are supposed to be your foster parents before you move in with them. Could you imagine? I mean, I think that's I I advocate

Matt Gilhooly (18:18)
I hope things have changed.

Robin Rosenbluth (18:19)
yes, you know, I I belong to sit on the board of an organization, I should have said this about twenty twenty six, called You Gotta Believe. And they find forever homes for older foster youth. And I love it, Matt. I mean it

I love hanging out with foster kids and the families and to see that, you know, no matter how old you are, you still need a family. And some of our kids

are

adopted like

in their late teens because they've never had a family before. So it just

Matt Gilhooly (18:54)
Heartbreaking.

Robin Rosenbluth (18:55)
it it just s it and it's also heartwarming when there's a good family. But I can remember

Matt Gilhooly (18:59)
Hm. Right.

Robin Rosenbluth (19:01)
my foster mother as soon as we walked in, you know, she was like, You can call me Aunt Harriet and you can call my husband Uncle Uncle Matt. And

I like, I want my real aunt. I don't want you to be my aunt,

Matt Gilhooly (19:20)
Right.

Robin Rosenbluth (19:20)
you know. I was like, you know, and it this I remember this vividly. Anyway, long short the it was very custodial care, you know. I can't say that I was, you know, I wasn't abused in that, you know, I wasn't whipped or beat or starved, but

We couldn't take the last if there was one fruit left, it wasn't for us. I know that sounds ridiculous, but these are the things that stick, you know. I never got new clothes,

Matt Gilhooly (19:48)
Yeah. Well mm hmm.

Robin Rosenbluth (19:53)
you know. I really want I was a teenager there, you know. And she would take her daughter

Matt Gilhooly (19:56)
Mm-hmm.

Robin Rosenbluth (19:58)
shopping. She had a discount because she worked at you know, one of those discount clothing stores. She never took me. So yeah.

Matt Gilhooly (20:06)
Hm. Curious though,

like are was your aunt not allowed to try to foster or adopt you or any of those things? Like was that not a thing?

Robin Rosenbluth (20:17)
So here's what

happened is because my father quote won, he told the social workers that he didn't want us to have any contact with them. And so the entire time I was in foster care, five and a half years in the family and four months in the shelter, I had no contact with my brothers, with my aunt, with any relative.

I was totally abandoned, you know. Just my sister.

Matt Gilhooly (20:44)
Just your sister.

Robin Rosenbluth (20:45)
Right.

Matt Gilhooly (20:46)
Yeah. So so you stayed with the same foster family and okay. Is that a good

Robin Rosenbluth (20:49)
I did. I

Matt Gilhooly (20:52)
thing?

Robin Rosenbluth (20:52)
Well, I would have

Matt Gilhooly (20:53)
See you.

Robin Rosenbluth (20:54)
liked to have been with a family that maybe showed me some affection, you know, or some concern. They never came to any school event. They never looked at my homework. They never I mean, you know, and all of this was happening in front of me with her kid. but I you know, I was a teenager. I you know, like I kept a diary of those time that time.

And

you know, I was like I I was kind of a normal teenager on some level, you know. I mean I I had crushes and I talked with my girlfriends and I had a a a very I had a bunch of really close friends. one I'm still very close to. her famil I used to sleep over her house a lot. And for my sixteenth birthday, her parents actually bought me a bicycle, can you imagine? thinking about they were so lovely. So

I had that family and I also had some social work not social workers, guidance counselors who took care of encouraging me to go to college. I had no money. My father didn't

Matt Gilhooly (21:53)
Hmm. Yeah. Right.

Robin Rosenbluth (21:56)
want me to go to college. In fact, he so here's the thing, I always wanted to travel. I always I was a big reader and I I

experienced, you know, other countries through reading and movies and my guidance counselor actually found this college. It was called Friends World College, where in order to graduate you have to live in two different cultures. So you have to travel. They had campuses in across the country, all across the world. so, you know

My father called the school and said, he didn't want me to go. And if I went he would sue them.

And I I didn't know this at first. You know, all my friends were getting their acceptance letters and I

Matt Gilhooly (22:43)
Right.

Robin Rosenbluth (22:44)
had nothing. no, my bio father, so he would

Matt Gilhooly (22:45)
What your foster father or your real father? okay.

Robin Rosenbluth (22:50)
I think I saw him maybe once or twice during the entire five and a half years where he actually drove out. He used to call me and say terrible things.

So I don't know what your situation was, but he was not a nice person. this woman, his

Matt Gilhooly (23:06)
Yeah, no. I was lucky.

Robin Rosenbluth (23:08)
his partner, used to say things like, Stan, how could you let her talk to you like that? She didn't write to you this week. The letter was dirty. And so he would scold me. He would say, I can't even I mean, I don't even want to say exactly all of the bad things he said to me. But, you know, in order to

take back my own self esteem. It took quite a while after being berated

Matt Gilhooly (23:32)
Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (23:33)
by the only parent you had. And yeah, he was was not a good person. And he was weak, and mean.

Matt Gilhooly (23:39)
Yeah, I'm

sure he had I'm sure we could figure out all the demons that he had that that

but

Robin Rosenbluth (23:44)
Yeah.

Matt Gilhooly (23:44)
he I mean it's also a choice when you continue to to do those things and I'm just shocked that someone would send you to foster care and then still stay in contact. It's almost like maybe it would have been better if you

never heard from him.

Robin Rosenbluth (24:00)
it would have been. I would have been stronger. you

know, he was trying to still control me. and that's why I'm so happy for you, really.

Matt Gilhooly (24:06)
Yeah. I was lucky. My dad wanted me, so I felt yeah. My parents were divorced,

but he stepped up. I mean, did he do everything right? He will admit that we did not, but that's okay. You know, we tried to figure it out together. But you have this situation in which the love and all the things that you probably felt safe in got ripped from you when your mother died and then there was no one there to catch you.

Robin Rosenbluth (24:33)
thing that's really important is it doesn't take very much for a kid to know that there are good people in the world, even when they're

Matt Gilhooly (24:43)
Mm-hmm.

Robin Rosenbluth (24:44)
being mistreated. So to have the experience of my close friend's parents being so kind to me and I had two guidance counselors who really really like

cared about me, you know, I mean, professionally. Actually, one I really liked so much, he invited me to his house once, and, you know, just to see the way he interacted with his wife when I was, you know, sixteen, seventeen

Matt Gilhooly (25:10)
Mm-hmm.

Robin Rosenbluth (25:10)
was very impactful because it was like a a a nice relationship.

but anyway I found out that my father had called the school because

my music teacher actually lived next door to the admissions office. Like, this is how life happens. Like in a minute you find something. And then I was this tough girl that I had never been. I was almost my foster parents had thrown me out. They said at the end of school, literally at the end when when I graduated from twelfth grade, they didn't want my sister and me anymore. They wanted to go on a family vacation. I swear, that's what they said.

So, right, well you could see we weren't part of the family ever.

it was really unfortunately it was a way for and this is true in foster care. There are too many foster parents who do it to get the money.

Matt Gilhooly (25:59)
Mm-hmm.

Robin Rosenbluth (26:00)
you know, you get paid and you get a clothing allowance in addition to a monthly allowance, and that's how they sent their kid to college, you know, it helped them because they were both clerks and you know. Anyway,

Matt Gilhooly (26:13)
Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (26:13)
I called the school, Matt, and I said, by the time I go to this school, if you accept me, I'll be eighteen and if you don't accept me because of my father, I am going to take it to court too. Of course I was just b BSing, but you know and I

got accepted.

Matt Gilhooly (26:30)
I mean, you gotta s

Good. I mean, did that feel like this is total assumption here and probably wrong, but was it like the first time where you took your power back or were there other moments in which you felt like you had the power?

Robin Rosenbluth (26:44)
Well, I did it clandestinely

before, you know, I would say that I was sleeping over a friend's house and then I'd go somewhere where I wasn't supposed to go and all of that kind of stuff. But it was the first time I actually I called my father and I almost never called him because I never wanted to speak to him because he was so abusive.

Matt Gilhooly (27:01)
Right.

Robin Rosenbluth (27:02)
and I said, How could you do this to me? You know, you've been controlling my life ever since you know, mom died. And and this is the one thing I truly want.

How could you do this? You know, his idea for a woman, okay, this isn't the nineteen sixties, but or actually by this time it's the early nineteen seventies. You know, he wanted me to be a secretary and marry my boss if I was lucky enough, you know, and that would be my life. Hello. So

Matt Gilhooly (27:28)
Sounds dreamy.

Robin Rosenbluth (27:30)
Yeah. Anyway, you know, unfortun Yes, that's why I'm trying to be, you

Matt Gilhooly (27:34)
But he is a product of his time. I mean, that was

Robin Rosenbluth (27:38)
know.

kind on that level, but exactly, but

Matt Gilhooly (27:42)
Well you don't have to be. He treated you like crap, so you don't have to be kind.

Robin Rosenbluth (27:46)
yes, but you know what I I also feel like if you harbor hate, it freezes your own vulnerability and your own soul. So

Matt Gilhooly (27:53)
of course. Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (27:54)
I try I try when I can, even though, you know, if if you read my memoir, you'll see that I wasn't very kind to him either. But I did have some moments where he was a good father and I highlighted that. But

Anyway, that was

Matt Gilhooly (28:08)
Mm.

Robin Rosenbluth (28:09)
the last I saw him. He didn't respond to me. And and I said,

Matt Gilhooly (28:11)
Okay. Good.

Robin Rosenbluth (28:13)
Dad, I'm trying, I'm I'm not trying to be mean to you. This is really what I want. And he wouldn't talk to me. And I said, Dad, if you can't talk to me, I mean, forget it. I don't want to talk to you.

Matt Gilhooly (28:24)
Right.

Robin Rosenbluth (28:25)
And that was it. I never ever heard from him. I was 17 years old, and

Matt Gilhooly (28:30)
Ever?

Robin Rosenbluth (28:30)
he w never. never. So,

Matt Gilhooly (28:33)
Wow.

Robin Rosenbluth (28:33)
yeah.

And then I just I got into

Matt Gilhooly (28:35)
So so you got into college though? You were able to escape?

Robin Rosenbluth (28:38)
this college and I was able to travel all around the world. And you know how we were saying when we first started how you could be vulnerable to lots of different people and if you could just talk to people, you could see the common humanity. Well, that's what I

wanted to do. And I especially wanted to live in a country that was run by black people.

After everything I had experienced. My first semester,

I went to the South. I mean like Mississippi, Alabama, Georgia, and I really understood racism again. And it mattered to me, you know? And

anyway, I spent a year living in Kenya, and that's what my book is about. it's

a braided memoir about

Who I was as a child and how I managed to be the kind of person who in 1973, at the age of 18, traveled to Kenya and I lived in a nomadic village, mud huts, no water, no running water. There was water, no toilets, no electricity, obviously. And I was there for nine months. I was teaching school.

I learned Swahili and that experience I have to tell you.

Going into foster care was the biggest life shift that changed my trajectory. But when I was there, the transformation of finally being accepted, I was the only white

Matt Gilhooly (30:08)
Mm-hmm.

Robin Rosenbluth (30:08)
person in the village, the only foreigner for all this all this all these months, not without difficulty, because really who is this white girl being, you know, living here?

But by the end they didn't want me to leave and and and I read about this and and that how that happened and how I allowed myself to be vulnerable, it made me believe that there was hope that

everybody wouldn't abandon me.

Matt Gilhooly (30:38)
Mm.

Yeah. Was it would you say that that was your first maybe intentional part of your healing journey? Like when you got out of situation US situation?

Robin Rosenbluth (30:53)
Well, it was transformative in a way that a stranger, people I didn't know, could I could find more belonging there, more connection than

Matt Gilhooly (31:04)
Okay.

Robin Rosenbluth (31:04)
I had with the strangers, my stepmother and my even my own father and my foster parents. But what I left out of my story, Matt, was I went back to my aunt when I grew

Like first I didn't know where I was gonna go and so first I went with the people I used to babysit for and then I went with my boyfriend, my first boyfriend. And then and then when none of that was working, I called my cousin who had when she got hurt my aunt my mother's twin sisters had two daughters and you know, I knew them very well because I had lived with them and

When the older one was in college and got a car, she came to visit me in my last year at foster care. And it was all hush hush, you know, because they we weren't supposed to do this. 'cause my father would find out and anyway. So then I finally called her and said, You know, I have nowhere to live. Do you think I could come back and stay with you? And my aunt opened her heart, you know. Just sh

she's she was like my surrogate mother, so I'm

so fortunate to have had that experience with her as I grew. and honestly, I don't know if you have kids met, but having children has given me this opportunity to reparent myself in a beautiful way. You know, like I

Matt Gilhooly (32:26)
Hm. Okay.

Robin Rosenbluth (32:27)
I I was not my father. I was not my foster mother's, you know, I was a good parent. I was a good mother and and to

And my kids I mean, I just had a birthday last weekend and and my kids all came and spent the weekend with me. I mean, you know,

Matt Gilhooly (32:46)
I love that.

Robin Rosenbluth (32:47)
I mean they're you know, they're adults in their thirties and my oldest

Matt Gilhooly (32:50)
Yeah. Do you think

that do you think that you're you were do you think that all those negative experiences made you a better parent because you knew

Robin Rosenbluth (33:00)
Yes.

Matt Gilhooly (33:00)
what you did okay.

Robin Rosenbluth (33:02)
I really do. I and I kind you know, I don't think every parent is I mean I think most parents do the every parent tries to do the best that they can, except as you could see, there are some exceptions

Matt Gilhooly (33:13)
Yeah, except your family, yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (33:15)
to the rule. But I

Matt Gilhooly (33:17)
Unless that

was the best he knew how to do and that's pretty sad.

Robin Rosenbluth (33:20)
That is true. But I think knowing what you didn't want to do, the traps that you didn't want to fall into. So I was like a very conscious parent, especially in the beginning, you know.

Matt Gilhooly (33:32)
Okay. Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (33:34)
but

Matt Gilhooly (33:35)
Selfish, selfishly, I'm curious about your grief journey, losing your mom, because for me, it was very much it was my mom died in 1989. And still at that time period, people weren't talking about grief or especially my dad was in his mid-30s. He was not talking about grief and how to help an eight-year-old. And

so I

Robin Rosenbluth (33:56)
Yeah.

Matt Gilhooly (33:56)
just assumed that I had to show everyone I was gonna be okay. So for me, it was like,

Robin Rosenbluth (34:00)
Mm.

Matt Gilhooly (34:01)
I wasn't until my early thirties until I really started processing the loss in a like a healthy way. And

Robin Rosenbluth (34:07)
Yeah.

Matt Gilhooly (34:08)
so that's why I was curious about like if in Kenya or, you know, like wherever you were, when did you start or did you not have to like grieve that loss

Robin Rosenbluth (34:18)
Mm.

Matt Gilhooly (34:18)
and and move through it?

Robin Rosenbluth (34:21)
Honestly, I don't think it's ever stopped. So you should see.

Matt Gilhooly (34:24)
Okay.

Robin Rosenbluth (34:25)
You should see the house here. I like I think I pointed up here, like this is a picture that

was painted of my mother. I have a picture of my mother in my bedroom. I had one with me in Kenya. and then every time I would see like

When I first moved to Kenya, I was living in a mud hut with this woman who was hosting me until the teacher's house, which was tin, was ready. And she had three kids and just watching her parent her children, you know, I

kept thinking about it. And then, you know, when some of the local people there would teach me like

some of the crafts I would think about my mother like she would have taught me how to knit. She was a painter, you know I I I always thought of her. I don't think I you know and then there was one woman the village midwife in Kenya who sort of took me under her wing and I write a lot about this and

You know, she was very affectionate. It was like the first time I felt like that kind of almost parental love from this complete

Matt Gilhooly (35:35)
Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (35:36)
this person I had never met before. I moved there. You know, she was so kind

Matt Gilhooly (35:42)
Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (35:42)
and and these are like semi nomadic people who I you know th she didn't have to be nice to me. I mean, she was lovely. She taught me how to weave.

she brought me a chicken when I first came.

Matt Gilhooly (35:53)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (35:55)
I mean, all these fun stories, but so seeing these people, seeing the women who took care of me, I always thought of my mother. You know, what I missed.

Matt Gilhooly (36:07)
That's so interesting. I mean I think it's beautiful,

Robin Rosenbluth (36:07)
But I would I don't know about you, but

Matt Gilhooly (36:09)
but

Robin Rosenbluth (36:10)
yeah. Yeah. But you know, I had I had a lot of work to do in therapy. I mean, I'm not ashamed to actually talk about it because

Matt Gilhooly (36:19)
No, and nor should you be.

Robin Rosenbluth (36:21)
You

know, I think it's such an important thing, especially when you've had such abandonment. you need to know you need to almost relive it to get through it, you know. You can't you can't

Matt Gilhooly (36:33)
Mm-hmm.

Robin Rosenbluth (36:33)
you can't stuff it down, you know, you have to so I mean, you know, yeah, I I could listen, I I watch movies on TV with like loving families and I cry still. I don't know about you, man.

Matt Gilhooly (36:45)
Good. It's

healthy. You know, it's interesting. I I love that you kept your mom's memory or the memory you had of your mom and maybe the stories you were carrying alive within you because I didn't do that. I I don't know that I had the wherewithal of those memories. I think I probably

pushed them down or blocked them out. And then I just did that for so long that at this point in in my life, my mom is more.

People are gonna hate that I say this, but it it feels like she was more of a figment. Like she was

Robin Rosenbluth (37:20)
Yes.

Matt Gilhooly (37:21)
the idea of a mother. I know she existed and I know she was a beautiful soul from all the stories that pe but I don't remember consciously that experience with her. And I think it's probably because of the twenty years that I spent pushing down the grief and processing it and

knowing that other people got uncomfortable if I was to ever bring her up.

So it's it's it's very beautiful to hear you losing someone as close as as I did at at the same age going

Robin Rosenbluth (37:52)
Right.

Matt Gilhooly (37:52)
through all that you went through to be able to continue to carry her with you to now. Like now for me, I'll look at a picture, I'm like, Yes, that's my mom, but I don't I don't remember. So it I I love that you you brought her with you.

Robin Rosenbluth (38:09)
Yeah, well, you know, it's not about memory. I mean, some of my memories this is a funny thing when you write a memoir, you know. my older brother is was eighteen when she died. So he rem so if you don't have any siblings to tell you about what it was like, right. So that that's part of it. You know, he would tell me stories about what mom did and you know so so how do I get the you know, the the memories, how do I

It's very funny, you know, I wrote something in the in the I always thought that my mom made chicken soup. When I smell chicken soup I think of my mom. My brother said, I don't think mom made chicken soup

I said, well I when I make chicken soup I

Matt Gilhooly (38:56)
You remember a a certain version of her.

Robin Rosenbluth (38:58)
think of it as what my mom would have made. It's so funny.

Matt Gilhooly (39:01)
Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (39:02)
Cause memory is you know, it's it you patch it together, Matt, in so many different ways, you know. There are pictures, I have pictures of her. my mother's twin sister told me stories about them. Didn't your aunt tell you stories about your mom?

Matt Gilhooly (39:17)
Yeah.

well I had a my mom had a twin brother and the first

Robin Rosenbluth (39:22)
okay.

Matt Gilhooly (39:22)
conversation I ever had with him was when I was thirty. So you that gives

you some example of yeah. So they weren't

Robin Rosenbluth (39:30)
That's different. Very different.

Matt Gilhooly (39:31)
they were close until they weren't, and then yeah, it's I'm not in touch with with him and there are reasons there, but yeah. So I didn't and no one like my

My dad's mom was really close with my mother, like best friend, kind of close. And she never wanted to talk about it or my mom, the relationship or any of those things, because it hurt too much. And she was of the generation,

Robin Rosenbluth (39:54)
Mm.

Matt Gilhooly (39:55)
she was born in the thirties that, you know, she wasn't really taught to process her her feelings. Her mom died when she was two. So, like a lot

Robin Rosenbluth (40:01)
Yeah. Yeah.

Matt Gilhooly (40:03)
of the things that come along with that. So I didn't have a lot of the the stories. I mean, when I was in my thirties, like when I was trying

When I finally kind of went to therapy and figured out that like I was ready to move through this, I asked some of my family members to put some thoughts together about their experiences with my mom. And only a few people did it because

they just didn't have the tools in their heart or in their mind to do it.

And so, you know, it's kind of a product of of the generations that that we have gone through in our times, right? Like of what we experience. I think

For people that might lose parents nowadays, might be different because people are a little bit more open. People are talking about grief. People are talking about mental health and having

Robin Rosenbluth (40:49)
Right.

Matt Gilhooly (40:50)
all the emotions. And, you know, I think as much as there's rough things for young people,

Robin Rosenbluth (40:52)
Some

Matt Gilhooly (40:56)
there's still some some benefits to people being more open now. But, you know, I

think so different

Robin Rosenbluth (41:03)
Well, you know

Matt Gilhooly (41:04)
so different from your experience.

Robin Rosenbluth (41:07)
Back then I didn't even know my mother died when she was when she had passed because I had gone to visit in the hospital, but I you know, we're not allowed to go into the hospital when you're that young. So literally I the last time I saw my mother I was on a chair in the on the grass, looking up at the window and my father picked her up and waved. and then

They had a funeral, we didn't go. They sat Shiva, which is what Jews do after for a whole week I hadn't seen my father. He didn't even tell us where he was and what he was doing. I mean and that is something that has

Matt Gilhooly (41:45)
So you had to create this.

Robin Rosenbluth (41:47)
really changed. I g I I would definitely, you know, my children have gone to funerals, you know, so

Matt Gilhooly (41:57)
Yeah, my first funeral was my mom's and you know, I've gone to them since and I have a different appro a different feeling about death after after losing my mom in that way. But I'm and I'll ask you this for your story. For me, losing my mom the way I did and struggling the way I did made me or gave me the ability and the strength to have the most beautiful of endings with my grandmother when she got diagnosed with cancer and we knew things were coming, like

I was able to sit down and actually have that final conversation and say

all the things that I ever wanted to say so that there was nothing left unsaid if she was to pass that night or whatever it may be. And then I sat

by her bedside for the last 96 hours of her life to just be there. That's all. But I think if I had not lost my mom in that way, I don't know that I would have done that.

Robin Rosenbluth (42:53)
Hmm.

Matt Gilhooly (42:54)
But it just felt like the most beautiful of endings. Did it feel

Robin Rosenbluth (42:54)
I did that with my aunt. Yeah. Yeah, I love that.

Matt Gilhooly (42:59)
that way?

Robin Rosenbluth (43:00)
Well, you know, as I said, I was very close to my aunt. when she was in hospice, she died when she was ninety four. So I had a long time with her, and you know what's crazy is

Cancer was rampant in the family. All of my aunts died of cancer, including my mom. And my aunt had cancer three times. she was the only one who beat it. And she had one very rare kind of cancer and and written up in all of the medical journals because she's the only person who lived with this kind of cancer. I mean, like, I'm not making this up. And

Anyway, when she was in hospice, I I mean we I was there. I was, you know, by her bed also. And we had spent so many times, just the two of us going places and talking and so that's you know, I think that really helped me in, you know, w in a different way than you had that opportunity to feel because

We'd often talk about things, you know, she said, your mother would have loved that or you know, they met on you know, they used to double date. They slept in the same bed, you know. They

Matt Gilhooly (44:14)
Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (44:15)
talked to each other every day, including on their honeymoons. So, you know. So it was lovely to

Matt Gilhooly (44:22)
You know? I I

Robin Rosenbluth (44:23)
have that.

Matt Gilhooly (44:24)
yeah. So do you do you th go ahead.

Robin Rosenbluth (44:28)
No, I was just gonna say I think what's so important is you know, I think to get through the grief you have to actually understand that there that there are other people. Like I don't think you could pass through the grief. One could pass through the grief if you don't find love, really, you know.

I think I think love is the counterpoint to grief, you know.

to

some degree because knowing that there's I mean, that's what, you know, what is it all about at the end of the day, you know? I mean, I had a nice career. It was, you know, and I'm very happy to, you know, write this memoir and we'll see what happens with it when it comes out, you know, but but

ultimately what makes me really happy are my family and friends and the connection that I have with people.

And I that I never thought I'd really have, you know. Like

Matt Gilhooly (45:25)
Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (45:26)
to have this family I mean, yeah,

Matt Gilhooly (45:27)
Not with that upbringing. Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (45:30)
I mean, I have so much love in my life now. And and you know, that's part of why I wrote this book is I really wanted foster kids to know that don't despair. There's a life after after pain, if it's grief, if it's abuse, if it's

Matt Gilhooly (45:48)
Yeah. Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (45:51)
custodial care, if it's terrible congregate care for the rest of you know your teen years, you have a longer opportunity to be an adult and make something change for yourself. and it really it just takes one or two people to make you know that that's possible. I'm so happy for you that your father was there for you.

Otherwise you would have wound up in foster

Matt Gilhooly (46:13)
Yeah. Me too.

Robin Rosenbluth (46:15)
care.

Matt Gilhooly (46:17)
Yeah, it was I'm eternally grateful. And I think my relationship with my father is far better than it would have been. My parents were divorced and he lived states away. So, you know, I wasn't gonna see him very often. So, you know, there are silver linings if we choose to find them. And I I find them too in my rough grief journey in my teens and in my twenties, and all the stupid things that I would think and do and whatever. And

You know, I'm th I'm grateful for all of it because I was doing it for some reason. I was trying to protect myself from whatever I wasn't ready for. You know, so I am grateful for that. But I I this is a really this might come across bad, but I hope it doesn't. It's I think about I think about how terrible your experience with your father was for an extended period of time. Do you ever think about that like foster care situation or being

Sent to that shelter as possibly was a better version of what you would have had if you had to stay with your father. Okay. And

Robin Rosenbluth (47:24)
Yes, I have thought of that. And

well, if he had abandoned me for the entire time and constantly lived with his girlfriend and I grew up having to take care of my sister the entire

Matt Gilhooly (47:40)
Mm.

Robin Rosenbluth (47:40)
time, it would have been awful.

and and if I had stayed with my stepmother, it would have been awful.

when I couldn't have even had friends back then. I mean, I remember having an argument with my father when when he said, Who's watching your sister? when he called one time and I said, Well, my foster parents are. He said, I don't want strangers to watch my kid. And I'm like, Dad, Dad, this

Matt Gilhooly (48:09)
This is your fault.

Robin Rosenbluth (48:10)
is your yeah, you put us here. I was like, my god. So

Matt Gilhooly (48:12)
Right. Wild. Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (48:15)
so yes, yes.

It was hard enough. I mean, I used to cry after I got off of the phone with him more times than not. And you know,

Matt Gilhooly (48:23)
I bet and if you had to live with that.

Robin Rosenbluth (48:25)
and if I had to live with that abuse, I d I'm not sure I would have been as I guess healthy as I've become after

Matt Gilhooly (48:33)
Mm-hmm.

Robin Rosenbluth (48:33)
having a a difficult childhood. And you know

Matt Gilhooly (48:36)
Yeah. It's weird to think

of it's weird to think of your foster situation as rough as it w was in a way of like no love or whatever, like as a safer version than actually being with your father.

Robin Rosenbluth (48:49)
Yeah. No, it's it's an insightful point, Matt. and

Matt Gilhooly (48:53)
But look at you.

Look what you've done with your life. Not because of it, not in spite of it, just this next part of it. What

are you most proud

of?

Robin Rosenbluth (49:02)
Being a good parent.

That was the thing I was most afraid of. You know, I didn't have any good models, you know. I

had no model for good parenting. and you know, our kids often tell us that we did such a great job. I mean, they want to spend time with us. I'm not kidding, you know.

I mean, it is incredible.

we watch our grandson now two days a week and our daughter sleeps over one night between those two days and so we get to see her, which is a gift. And then my son is like a little jealous of it, you know, because he says, No, it's not fair. She gets more time with you. I know. So,

Matt Gilhooly (49:40)
Well he can come over and sleep whenever he wants.

Robin Rosenbluth (49:46)
you know, and they both live in New York for a while. They both lived in California, so I'm so happy that they're back in New

Matt Gilhooly (49:52)
Hmm.

Robin Rosenbluth (49:53)
York.

Matt Gilhooly (49:54)
I love that.

Robin Rosenbluth (49:55)
but yeah, I I would say that that is my that is the thing that makes me the happiest. And I can see my daughter with her son now. And it's it's it's her whole world, you know. It's so gorgeous to see that. and you know, she often says, Well Ma, I had a good model So it's very sweet. But

Matt Gilhooly (50:13)
See? Yeah, no.

Is there anything that you would looking back at your life, is there anything that you would change or do differently? Or

Robin Rosenbluth (50:23)
Mm.

Matt Gilhooly (50:23)
want to happen to you differently? Knowing what you know now?

Robin Rosenbluth (50:28)
to say, you know. I I wish that I

could have been more present for my younger sister. you know

Matt Gilhooly (50:38)
But you were a kid.

Robin Rosenbluth (50:40)
yeah, I know. you know, I was very tormented when I went off to college and she had to go back into the system. that was really hard. So, you know, but I I I couldn't have continued to take care of her.

You know, I was eighteen, I had no money. That's actually how I got into fundraising is I I had to raise money so I could go to college. And and yeah, it was pretty funny. So and I said, Wow

Matt Gilhooly (51:09)
And now you're

yeah, and now you're helping others feel loved, you know, whether

Robin Rosenbluth (51:15)
Yeah.

Matt Gilhooly (51:16)
that's your family or the the foster kids that you interact with and I mean I think

Like I wouldn't wish your experience on anyone, but at the same time, you've created something that is helping so many. And now your book's gonna come out and people are gonna see themselves in your story or parts of your story and feel like they can take the next step or they can try something different or whatever it may be.

Robin Rosenbluth (51:40)
Mm.

Matt Gilhooly (51:41)
I mean, that must be so f fulfilling in a way for you.

Robin Rosenbluth (51:45)
You know, I'm a I'm one of those people who is very goal oriented. that's how I

Matt Gilhooly (51:51)
How so?

Robin Rosenbluth (51:52)
that that's how I made it, you know. It's like I said, I don't know how the heck I'm gonna go to college. I don't have a dime, but I'll figure it out. And I did.

Matt Gilhooly (52:01)
Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (52:02)
And I didn't know how I'd be able to go off to Kenya and not and be

not hang out with my college students 'cause I figured why should I do that? I'm already you know, I wanted to immerse myself in another culture. And, you know,

Could I do it? You know? Could I could I do that? And I did. And, you know, back then it wasn't as common as it is now for people to travel all over the world when you get out of high school or in college. This was like in the early seventies. So, and you know, I said, I really want to write about this because I care about foster kids and I want I wanna talk about the changes that are needed in the system.

And I want

foster kids to know that there's it doesn't take much to find a better life. You can do it. and you have to keep yourself open. That's the thing, you know, when you've been knocked down as a foster kid. So many kids are in like, I don't know, sometimes ten, twelve homes. Because when when a kid just says one thing, they're out.

Unlike what, you know, they would do with their own children, because they don't throw their own children out, you know. that's what this organization does. You know, they they train the parents to treat the foster kids like their own and to make a commitment for life, not just for money.

and and I, you know, and I had this goal to write this book, which I didn't think I could do. I mean creative writing is not at all like

business

writing.

so I had to I had to take lots of classes and learn and, you know, I I have a sub stack where everything I've learned about writing I put down so that other writers and people who want to learn so I can

Matt Gilhooly (53:52)
Yeah. You're giving back.

Robin Rosenbluth (53:54)
give back to the community. And that's what my career

Matt Gilhooly (53:57)
Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (53:57)
in fundraising was. You know, I've always worked in organizations that I thought could make a difference because money matters. I hate to say it.

Matt Gilhooly (54:04)
Mm-hmm. I know.

Robin Rosenbluth (54:05)
If you don't

have money and so for nonprofit causes,

Matt Gilhooly (54:08)
Yeah. It's hard to do things.

Robin Rosenbluth (54:11)
yeah, you can't make your dreams come true, really. in in a in a programmatic way. So I feel very blessed that I've been able to in my own way make a difference. So and you're doing it too by listening to all these people and ha hearing their stories. I love that. What do you do when you're

Matt Gilhooly (54:22)
You've done it. Yeah. Hey. Yeah. It's important to me.

Robin Rosenbluth (54:31)
not doing this? What's your nine to five?

Matt Gilhooly (54:33)
I work in marketing and mortgage

Robin Rosenbluth (54:35)
Okay.

Matt Gilhooly (54:36)
technology company. So yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (54:38)
Okay.

Matt Gilhooly (54:38)
not as not as emotional as this, but let me ask you one

Robin Rosenbluth (54:42)
It's all right.

Matt Gilhooly (54:42)
more question and then we'll see how you can share your links and stuff so people can connect with you. But my question is, and it's an impossible question, but 2026 Robin, you could pass by the Robin that just found out she has to go to the shelter and your dad has chosen to send you.

And your sister

Robin Rosenbluth (55:03)
Mm.

Matt Gilhooly (55:04)
there. Is there anything you'd want to say to her?

Robin Rosenbluth (55:06)
Mm, yes. Hang in there. Hang in there, girl. You know, there's a better tomorrow. There really is a better tomorrow. And you know, you may feel alone now, but you won't always be alone. You may feel abandoned, but you won't always be abandoned. You know, I mean, it was hard to form

loving relationships in the beginning. I needed a lot of reassurance. You know, because you don't

Matt Gilhooly (55:37)
Yeah, a lot of trust.

Robin Rosenbluth (55:38)
you don't just you don't just like shed all of this as you were saying, you know? It's kind of with you. It shapes us

Matt Gilhooly (55:46)
Mm-hmm. Yeah. As much as we want to

Robin Rosenbluth (55:50)
as much as we want to, right, exactly.

Matt Gilhooly (55:52)
so

yeah. So if if people are, you know, they resonate with your story, they want to read your book, they want to connect with you, like what's the best way to find Robin these days?

Robin Rosenbluth (56:04)
Well, my book

Matt Gilhooly (56:05)
Don't give us your address.

Robin Rosenbluth (56:07)
I won't.

Matt Gilhooly (56:08)
Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (56:10)
Well, my book is currently available for pre order. So at any local retail outlet, or people could go into their local bookstore or library and ask for the book, which is Living with Strangers, Healing a Wounded Heart in a Distant Land. And

My you could check out my author website, which is robinrosenbluth.com. Pretty easy. And

Matt Gilhooly (56:40)
And we'll put that link we'll

put those links in the show notes for sure.

Robin Rosenbluth (56:43)
Thank you. yeah, and I'm on

Matt Gilhooly (56:44)
Mm-hmm.

Robin Rosenbluth (56:45)
I'm on social media. so and if people read the book and want to give a review, hop on to Goodreads or Amazon or Barnes and Nobles or wherever you buy it. And there's a contact page in my author website. So I'd love to hear from people, you know. I mean

Matt Gilhooly (57:05)
Yeah.

Robin Rosenbluth (57:06)
Honestly, you know, you have to say there's millions of books out there. so really what I do is I hope to touch some people's hearts, you know. I think the one other thing I wanted to say is the story about my life in Kenya is while it was about finding connection, I think it's also really important. What I would love people to understand is that there's this

That we're all human beings and we all have

Matt Gilhooly (57:35)
Mm-hmm.

Robin Rosenbluth (57:36)
the same kind of needs to, you know, be connected, to have a family, to find love, to have enough to eat. And that's what I found there. And, you know, with so much racism and xenophobia in the world, I hope people read the story and see the humanity and the and the love.

that I found for these people. were my friends, you know, I didn't have a sociological view, although I was learning about the cultural norms, but I found friends and connection. and so when you meet somebody from another country or you know, there's a lot you can learn and it really it's important to be open.

Matt Gilhooly (58:24)
I agree. I think, you know, that's why I have this podcast. I've heard from people all over the world and and hearing their stories, I'm like, Yep, totally different story than mine, but I feel it. Like I feel I understand it, you know, and we can

Robin Rosenbluth (58:35)
Yeah. Yeah.

Matt Gilhooly (58:37)
connect in that way. So I appreciate you coming on this journey with me and having this

conversation today.

Robin Rosenbluth (58:44)
I'm very grateful, you know, when I was listening to your podcasts, I I love how easy you were, you know, like you were engaged and thoughtful and responsive and you can't ask for more. It's just it's a gift. You have a a knack for talking to people.

Matt Gilhooly (59:03)
Well

well, I appreciate that and I will accept that. I it took a long way a long time to get here and I'm grateful that I'm here and we get to do this. So I'm going to say goodbye so that we can have our dinners and do whatever we need to do on our on our normal Thursday nights.

Robin Rosenbluth (59:18)
Perfect.

Matt Gilhooly (59:19)
But I do appreciate you and I appreciate everyone listening for nearly I guess these five years now, two hundred and eighty something episodes. So

Appreciate everyone. Share your story with the people around you. Share your story wherever you can 'cause they think it's gonna help someone. So thanks again, Robin.

Robin Rosenbluth (59:35)
Thank you so much. Take care. Bye bye.