I Went Undercover After My Partner's Suicide

Todd Maguire never wanted to be a police detective, but a dare turned into 27 years of service and a life-changing loss.

Todd's story starts with a simple dare at a pub that led him into a 27-year career in the Queensland police force. He spent years working as an undercover agent, where the constant pressure and danger became his new normal. But beneath the surface, he was carrying the weight of a tragedy that shifted everything.

On New Year's Day 2000, Todd lost his partner, Karen, to suicide. This profound suicide loss forced him into a dark period of drinking and running, leading him deeper into dangerous work as a way to avoid the pain. This conversation explores how that specific police trauma shaped his identity and how he eventually learned to face the reality he spent years trying to outrun.

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0:00 A Life Defined by a Single Yes
0:33 The Morning That Changed Everything
2:35 Reflecting on a Life After the Shift
5:44 Growing Up in a Simpler Brisbane
7:58 The Unexpected Call to Police Work
15:37 The Night the World Was Supposed to End
36:04 Becoming Donnie Wilson
42:03 Breaking the Cycle of Silence

Guest Bio:

Todd Maguire spent twenty-seven years with the Queensland Police Service, largely as a detective, including two years working undercover as "Donny Wilson." He is the author of the memoir Donny: Undercover Cop with a Deathwish, which tells the story of the grief, the undercover years, and the long recovery that followed the loss of his partner, Karen, in 2000.

Website: www.toddmaguire.com.au

Facebook: Todd Maguire

Instagram: @todd_author_donny