Renee shares her story of childhood sexual abuse and how the secret she was forced to keep shaped her identity for decades.

This conversation focuses on the long-term impact of childhood sexual abuse and the struggle to separate personal worth from past trauma. It is intended for anyone currently navigating the complex journey of healing from trauma, especially those who grew up believing that abuse was their own fault. By sharing her experience, Renee illustrates how carrying the weight of silence affects daily choices and self-perception.

Throughout this discussion, we address the specific challenges of processing childhood trauma in adulthood. Understanding how these early experiences influence behavior is a critical step in overcoming abuse and reclaiming one's life. This session provides a candid look at the path toward self-acceptance after years of internalized shame.

In this episode, Ranae shares:

- Growing up in a Minnesota town of 572 people where everyone knew everyone
- The abuse she experienced as a preteen and the words from her mother that shaped the next thirty years
- How shame quietly became people pleasing, self-sabotage, and dissociation
- The morning she stood at a mirror with two choices, and the one she picked
- Why she calls her prison sentence the start of her healing instead of the end of her story
- The prison psychologist who refused to let her coast through therapy
- Building Connecting to Cope, named for her dog, to help others understand the why behind hard choices

Ranae Van Roekel is the founder of Connecting to Cope, where she helps people understand the trauma behind the choices they make and supports them toward healing. Learn more or connect with her at www.connectingtocope.com.

- https://www.facebook.com/connectingtocope/
- https://www.linkedin.com/company/connecting-to-cope/
- https://www.instagram.com/connectingtocope/

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Timestamps:

00:00 Cold open

01:34 Welcome and introduction

04:22 Who Ranae is today

07:46 Growing up in small town Minnesota

09:00 The abuse and the silence that followed

14:00 People pleasing and self sabotage

19:00 Meeting Kevin and finding a safe place

21:00 The ticket business and the scheme that took over

23:45 The morning in front of the mirror

25:00 Sentencing and the limbo years

29:00 Meeting the psychologist who changed everything

36:00 The real life shift moment

47:40 Walking out free

55:00 Connecting to Cope and life now